Nicknames

One of the drawbacks of going into Christian Ministry/Theology as a career is the general paucity of good nicknames. Joel Osteen is known as the "Smiling Preacher." Lame. Apparently Martin Luther was lovingly referred to as the "Fearful Philosopher." Boring. The best nicknames tell you something about the person, but also roll of the tongue easily.

I think if you want a really good nickname you have to go into either the Mafia or sports. Sports tends to be the safer route. Golfers tend to become animals, as in "the golden bear," "the walrus" "the shark" "the goose" and of course Tiger. However animal nicknames are a dime a dozen. I prefer the more creative nicknames, Ernie Els is "The Big Easy." Fred "Crime Dog" McGriff (mixing a bit of the mafia theme in with a sports nickname). But the best of all is "The Big Unit."

There is however, one professor at Covenant who breaks the mold. Somehow Dr. Hans Bayer, already having one of the coolest names, also has two of the coolest nicknames. He is both the "Blond Bond," and "The Smiling Assassin." Those are cool nicknames. And he lives up to them, both with his pedagogical philosophy, "why should I be the only one who had to suffer as a student?" and by smiling constantly during lecture.

I'm thinking I could market myself better if I had a cool nickname. Jeff "The Biblical Unit" Tell. I don't know. What unit would I be? The Ephah? The Cubit?

Comments

Melanie said…
Maybe you and Aubrey could be Urim and Thummim.
Ken said…
Koko the Monkey.
Mark J. said…
Elvis?

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