Thursday, July 24, 2008

Vision

I got my eyes checked on Tuesday. It had been a while. I went because I knew I needed new glasses (my current pair I've had for 6 years) to wear some when I'm on call. My eyes always protest a little around 3 or 4 in the morning from being subjected to 18-20 hours of straight contact wearing in a fairly dry-aired building.

I actually told the nice nurse who was checking my vision that I knew I needed a new glasses prescription, but that "I feel like I'm seeing very well in my contacts. I don't think I need a new contact prescription."

Hah. Less than 30 seconds later as she was testing each of my eyes individually I quickly realized that the vision in my left eye was bad. Really bad. My right eye was ok, but I still was struggling way more than expected. She quickly made some adjustments and aha! Those tiny letters became crisp. I left my appointment with a new prescription and a brand new pair of contacts. The minute I put them on, I looked around and suddenly realized that I had, indeed, been living in a blurry world for quite some time.

I was thinking, then, about how much sin is just like this. We think we recognize the big sins in our lives - the blatant selfishness and pride, the anger and hate that makes us snap at our husbands or doubt God's goodness to us at all times. But suddenly, when we are truly reminded of who God is and what he has done for us, the hardness in our hearts can quickly soften and the scales can fall off as we realize that much more than those "big sins" we were avoiding, all this time we have been blinded to the small ways that our fallen-ness has crept into every single aspect of the way we live and think.

I praise God that he does continue to spit in our eyes even though we'd rather just stumble in our blindness, and offer us that living water when we want nothing more than to die of thirst in a desert.

And I pray that he continues to give my heart the vision check it needs.

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