Pregnancy after infertility.

Being pregnant after you're struggled to get that way is an interesting experience.

You'd think that once I finally was pregnant, all those old feelings and frustrations would go away.

Nope. The truth is that even though I'm pregnant, I still think like someone who is infertile. Especially right at the beginning, I'd still have this twinge of annoyance on hearing someone announce their second or third pregnancy. It still bothered me when I'd hear of someone announce they were "trying" then get pregnant 2 months later. As the months have gone on, I find that happening less and less, but still it's a struggle not to be jealous of those who had it so easily.

Part of me still has a hard time believing that I'm actually pregnant. That the treatment we did worked. It just won't entirely sink in that we went through one cycle of treatment and immediately got pregnant, when others I know continue to struggle. I almost feel bad that even though in the midst of our struggle it was very difficult, now it all seems like it was too easy.

I'm slowly starting to feel tiny movements inside me, and it's becoming more and more real. Even though I don't understand why God has been so good to me, I praise him for his endless grace and mercy.


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